I did say I’d do this, huh?
Transitions. They trip you up, totally screw up your groove. Thing is, our lives are soaked with them. So what are they?
If you’re really into this, I would suggest a visit to Terry Prince. She’s got this down, and teaches a mean course on Life Transitions. Also, I’m not hitting all the stages, because she does a great job of that in her class. Seriously. If you’re feeling this, go check her out.
Alright, back to transitions. So you’re born. That throws you for a serious loop. You’ve got to get used to things like air and light, the cold, wider varieties of sounds, eating, using your voice. You’re kinda at the mercy of the world at large, and don’t really have much personal agency at this point, but we’ll come back to this. But basically, every time you move from one stage of life to another, that’s a transition. Learn how to walk and parents need to babyproof the house? That’s a transition. Go to school? Graduate? Transitions. Off to college? Yup, transition. And they keep coming throughout life. Leave college? Move? Start a new job? More transitions. You’re living your life, doing your thing, the best way you know how, and these transitions come along and wreck your schedule, or give you new equipment or things to work with, or crowd out your old things, or some combination of all of that.
Let’s go back to the being born transition, since there’s babies everywhere in my social circle right now. The other way to look at it is from the other side of the equation: “you have a baby.” Huge transition, right there. You may (but most likely not) have the means to move into a right-sized place for yourselves. More often than not, there’s the move to make your current environment amiable to having a baby added to the mix. But aside from making sure there’s room for a crib, there are other considerations. Will there be room for all the stuff that comes along with baby? Diapers, blankets, onsies, hats, booties, you burn through all these things pretty quick with a fresh baby, and those that aren’t being used but are on standby for the next mishap take up room. That’s just thinking about some of the things that go directly on the baby. There’s other accessories that take up more room, room you are trying to carve out of your space. Things will get crowded out. Things will get stashed somewhere in the hopes of someday being able to come back to them. Things will be forgotten. And this is how, when said baby is 7, you are cleaning out some far forgotten corner of your domicile and come across the bag or shoebox of papers, catalogs, mail, receipts, and other assorted things from that moment in time. The intensity varies from person to person, like anything, but it’s there. So don’t panic when moving in with your partner, when switching careers, when taking in relatives, when welcoming a baby. The thing/space balance upheaval is natural, and there’s help for that if you need it. Just call.